Well I managed to get passed this week. Bad news, after stressfull events does not make me happy. I think I cried more this week than I have in the past year. I have sooper dooper high cholesterol, despite eating really healthy! Also Dr. Wood told me I can't even walk on a treadmill anymore. WTF am I suppossed to do for exercise? Kelly told me to start getting into the pool. OKAY WHAT POOL? the one at bardmoor isn't heated, the one at southwest rec isn't open on the weekends, and is only open until 2 on weekdays until summer time. no thanks. I have no idea what to do.
Work is stressing me out to no end. I'm called to fill in for someone and EXPECTED to make it as if I was on the schedule. I mean I love the fact that they think i'm so dependable, but I have NO life anymore. Atleast in Tally I went out atleast one night a week (usually it was on the weekend) but I got totally shitfaced. I'm not lush (anymore ) but I sorta miss it. USF is still college, but it;s not. I don;t get to do everything I used to. I have TONS more money. I make close to $300 a week and I made over $150 in tips on Valentine's day. I just hate the fact that the schedule gets changed and NO ONE TELLS ME I'M WORKING SATURDAY NIGHT. The owner (Joan) is in town from Bermuda for like a month, and Antoinette "gets sick". Bullshit. I overheard her husband, David, talking to Jana (MY USF/WORK BUDDY!) and he had the gaul to tell Jana (who makes the schedule.. .thank god I have it good with her because she's make me work Sundays which I DISPISE!) that Antoinette just needed a break from work. She worked on Wednesday (Valentine's Day is the busiest day of the year) and she's supposed to have that day off. Well so you call me? No offense but I'm 18 (soon to be 19!) and you really think I should be dealing with people on Friday night (for those of you who aren't working at a rest. Friday &Saturdays = really long nights). Your the one who can;t work 5 days a week and your the General Manager, yet you expect me to work a double on Saturdays because no one wants to work in the office or cashier on Saturday nights. Fuck that. Then the started scheduling me for OFFICE/BAR on Sundays. Two doubles in a weekend and 17 hours of classwork? I think not. I'm already so far behind in my online classes (I really don't have deadlines per say, but who wants to do 15 weeks worth of work in a week ... and study for finals? yeah me either....
So I had a coversation with David last night. I told him eccentially to suck my d. If he tells me to come in instead of asking I will not be coming in. If he wants to manipulate me into doing things by telling me I'll have to work on my birthday, he will lose me as an employee. I'm still floored that they have a 19 year old handle their monetary affairs on the weekends. I mean if I wasn't such a good person, I could steal a shitload. Or I could give people my keys and the alarm code and they could do it themselves. I would never but come on. David and Antoinette do not know how to work the cash register or do the daily sales upstairs so they can't even fill in. And they call themselves manager? Bobbi it's the equivalent to Myles at ABC. what a dumby.
In other news. They got me a huge cake and suprised me (again) for my birthday. Last year I remember when everyone had to be in the room I felt like everyone was starring at me. They did the same thing except as soon as a hung up the phone from taking a reservation mike turned the lights off (I thought I disconnected them by hanging up the phone) and started singing. I was like AWWWWW. I love you guys. see thats why I love LP. I hate the PATTONS but I love my friends there. They really are good to me.
I went to Fort Knox (the bar next door to LP) with Jill and Jim and Mike because they wanted to buy me drinks for my birthday. Stuey doesn't ask for ID'S because he's cool, so I got pretty wasted on Friday night. Bert - the other manager (who I LOVEEEEE) Andy, and the new guy Eric was there too. Bert is like 50 but he acts like a 30 year old and if I was into dating older guys I would totally date him! lol. weird I know, but I had to throw that out there. Some guy asked me for my number but I don't want a boyfriend/can't handle anymore stress right now otherwise I would have given it to him. This is why Shawn and I never worked out at FSU. We hung out for the last month I was there and made out and stuff but I never felt the pressure of HAVING to hang out with him. I really liked him too but I don't know. I think I'm weird My sister freaking has a boyfriend for 5 years and I can't have one for 6 months lol. Anyways they told me last night everything I said/did that I couldn't remember. I was really flirty after a drink though lol. It used to take me like 3 drinks to feel anything, now I'm shitfaced after 3. I love not drinking because of that reason. Anyways I kissed Jill and Mike and I think Jill felt me up lol. She's my besssst bessst friend at LP, well her and Jana. They call us three the 3 stooges. They are like 10 years older than me but I <3 them. Then everyone went back to Jim's house to smoke. I didn't because while I don't think underage drinking is a huge deal... illegal substances are. When I was at FSU/ in high school I always felt like I had to impress people. But LP I don;t have to. So I don't smoke and I'm very proud of that (lol how lame) because I can say no now. Bert gave me a hug when I left last night and told me to behave on my birthday. Seriously though if I wasn't so young I would date him. I know that might be sick, but he understands me and I can talk to him without him getting weirded out or anything. This might not make sense, but if I complain to Jana that I'm fat, she tells me "Jodi shut up" and walks away.I feel better, but coming from a 90 lb. skinny chick... not that much better. If I tell that to Bert he always says "Honey your beautiful. Just think, a very lucky guy will actually have something to hug, or will have something to lean his head against. I would rather my girl have some sort of booty than nothing at all. Jana has none, but your not suffereing in that department. =P. Then hugs me. I don't know maybe it's wrong, but he's like a father figure to me, maybe that's what I like. I don't want anyone to get the wrong thing from what I'm saying. lol nevermind.
Anyways tomorrow is my birthday. I'm not that excited, but I am. If Dad were reading this he would cry, but I'd really rather spend my birthday with my mom. She's been there and has gone with me to every doctor's appointment to figure out what's going on with me. Dad is just being straight up mean to me. I'm not getting that much because I don't need much/want much. I asked for money and gift certificates. I really want a new pair of Nike Shox, but I already have 2 pairs (my fav black pair I got when I was 16) and my white ones that I got for my europe trip. I just don't need them. I think I'll just put all of my money in the bank instead of spendning it right now. I will kill myself if I spend anymore money on MAC unless I can find some of my brushes on my wishlist for under retail.
Alright I procrastinated long enough... back to the books!
My back/sholders/neck are killing me right now. I took my skelaxin that Dr. Weiss gave me, but it's not helping me much. I can't take the other stuff because I'll fall asleep. I know all I ever do is complain. My life since bwing home from FSU has just been a spiraling downfall.I've thought twice about moving away from everything/everyone and never telling people where I am. I've thought about quiting school twice. I mean I'm sure it's normal but not me. I have had so many freaking letdowns from college/school/everything. I'm just in a huge pit of despair
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